He studies me for a minute, though I ain't sure what he can really see with this light. The silence stretches out thin, but I don't dare pull my arm away from 'em. Even with no sun, I can see the outline of his physique with the moon. His arms are bigger than mine, bigger than daddy's and Mr. Johnston's. He'd kill me if I gave him the chance.
Eventually, my patience grows short. I've never have been no patient woman, even when I was a girl. Daddy never made me wait for nothin' and with my blue eyes and girly charm, I could weasel somethin' outta anyone. It's part of why Mary hates me. I was real awful to her.
But even though I know it's an awful trait, I still let myself fidget, words startin' to sprout from my mouth without my consent.
"I won't say nothin' 'bout you goin' if you do, neither, unless I'm asked."
I ain't really sure if that's the truth. He's a slave, and I know better than to let him go. He's ours, he's daddy's. But at the same time, if he ain't happy maybe he should go, since he's got the chance I never will, I should let 'em. Then again, makin' him come with me could help 'em in the end. I wasn't lyin' 'bout the dogs. He can't beat them hounds. The whole thing just makes me upset, and I wish I could go back in time and go minutes before he shows. Then I wouldn't have a war within my own body.
"Will they ask?"
He's really well spoken for a slave, and I wonder in a small corner of my brain, if he was schooled. I ain't sure, but I don't think daddy lets slaves learn. But this one could be from somewhere where they were allowed.
"I ain't sure. But I don't want to talk to no one right now, anyhow."
Suddenly, the tears come back with revenge and I find myself sobbin' hard. I try to keep it quiet, but I heave giant breaths, and you could probably hear from a mile up the road. The slave don't react, just lookin' in my direction like before.
It's embarrassin', but worse than that, it brings back memories I don't like. About James, about daddy. I glance out at the moon, and it's blurry beneath my tears. Daddy's probably in my room now, lookin' for his favorite daughter, lookin' at the same moon.
The slave suddenly shifts his weight and takes his hand from my arm. I step back in surprise, my own hand automatically goin' to the place where his had been.
"I'll come, you jus' tell no one, you hear? No one."
Eventually, my patience grows short. I've never have been no patient woman, even when I was a girl. Daddy never made me wait for nothin' and with my blue eyes and girly charm, I could weasel somethin' outta anyone. It's part of why Mary hates me. I was real awful to her.
But even though I know it's an awful trait, I still let myself fidget, words startin' to sprout from my mouth without my consent.
"I won't say nothin' 'bout you goin' if you do, neither, unless I'm asked."
I ain't really sure if that's the truth. He's a slave, and I know better than to let him go. He's ours, he's daddy's. But at the same time, if he ain't happy maybe he should go, since he's got the chance I never will, I should let 'em. Then again, makin' him come with me could help 'em in the end. I wasn't lyin' 'bout the dogs. He can't beat them hounds. The whole thing just makes me upset, and I wish I could go back in time and go minutes before he shows. Then I wouldn't have a war within my own body.
"Will they ask?"
He's really well spoken for a slave, and I wonder in a small corner of my brain, if he was schooled. I ain't sure, but I don't think daddy lets slaves learn. But this one could be from somewhere where they were allowed.
"I ain't sure. But I don't want to talk to no one right now, anyhow."
Suddenly, the tears come back with revenge and I find myself sobbin' hard. I try to keep it quiet, but I heave giant breaths, and you could probably hear from a mile up the road. The slave don't react, just lookin' in my direction like before.
It's embarrassin', but worse than that, it brings back memories I don't like. About James, about daddy. I glance out at the moon, and it's blurry beneath my tears. Daddy's probably in my room now, lookin' for his favorite daughter, lookin' at the same moon.
The slave suddenly shifts his weight and takes his hand from my arm. I step back in surprise, my own hand automatically goin' to the place where his had been.
"I'll come, you jus' tell no one, you hear? No one."
