"You think you can do it by yourself now?"
I sigh, frustrated with my failure. He's held my hand- literally- fo' the past three times- with only one try of my own between. I should get it by now- I real should- but I don't.
"Maybe we should call it a nigh'- I gettin' real tired," I lie. I've been retirin' early lately an' sleepin' in jus' as lon'. I'm all caught up on sleep.
"I think that you lyin'," he says, "You jus' don't think you can do it."
"That ain't true!" The pitch in my voice rises real high, an' I almos' screechin' it. Embarrassed, I lean back down against the tree, an' hide my face from him. Most likely in this light, he won't be able to see how red my skin is, but I ain't riskin' it. It mus' be nice bein' so dark.
"You kno' I righ'. You don't kno' how to do it, admit it."
"No- cause it ain't true." This time I too quiet, almos' sayin' that I don't believe in myself. I don't- but he shouldn't kno' that. He shouldn't be able to make fun of me like that.
"Prove it." He practically shoves the pencil in my face- to save myself I grab it from 'em- our fingers touchin' fo' the slightest moment.
"I don't gotta prove nothin' to you."
He raises one eyebrow, "Then I don't believe you."
I turn away from 'is eyes, an' look up at the sky. The moon is barely visible- but all the stars are winkin' away at me- askin' me to prove it to them too.
"Fine- hand me the paper."
He slides it over, mindful of the dirt an' sticks beneath it. Once in fron' a me- I glace over at all our practices before puttin' the pencil to paper. Jus' as I about to start- my hand all shaky, I turn back to 'em.
"If I do this- it the las' letter fo' tonigh'. Tomorrow we can start with H."
He nods, "If you do it." His voice rises when he says if, like he still don't believe I can write a G. I don't think I can- but if he got no right. He a slave- an' if a colored man can write it- so can I.
My hand shakes when I put it to the paper, drawin' the first line up to the loop, I loop it 'round then back down an' cross it over. It took longer fo' me alone to complete it then with 'em an' it don't look so well, the line are all shaky an' the loops a little in the wron' spot- but it a G. Anyone could tell.
"Alrigh'," he says, "Do another one."
"But- you said."
I sigh, frustrated with my failure. He's held my hand- literally- fo' the past three times- with only one try of my own between. I should get it by now- I real should- but I don't.
"Maybe we should call it a nigh'- I gettin' real tired," I lie. I've been retirin' early lately an' sleepin' in jus' as lon'. I'm all caught up on sleep.
"I think that you lyin'," he says, "You jus' don't think you can do it."
"That ain't true!" The pitch in my voice rises real high, an' I almos' screechin' it. Embarrassed, I lean back down against the tree, an' hide my face from him. Most likely in this light, he won't be able to see how red my skin is, but I ain't riskin' it. It mus' be nice bein' so dark.
"You kno' I righ'. You don't kno' how to do it, admit it."
"No- cause it ain't true." This time I too quiet, almos' sayin' that I don't believe in myself. I don't- but he shouldn't kno' that. He shouldn't be able to make fun of me like that.
"Prove it." He practically shoves the pencil in my face- to save myself I grab it from 'em- our fingers touchin' fo' the slightest moment.
"I don't gotta prove nothin' to you."
He raises one eyebrow, "Then I don't believe you."
I turn away from 'is eyes, an' look up at the sky. The moon is barely visible- but all the stars are winkin' away at me- askin' me to prove it to them too.
"Fine- hand me the paper."
He slides it over, mindful of the dirt an' sticks beneath it. Once in fron' a me- I glace over at all our practices before puttin' the pencil to paper. Jus' as I about to start- my hand all shaky, I turn back to 'em.
"If I do this- it the las' letter fo' tonigh'. Tomorrow we can start with H."
He nods, "If you do it." His voice rises when he says if, like he still don't believe I can write a G. I don't think I can- but if he got no right. He a slave- an' if a colored man can write it- so can I.
My hand shakes when I put it to the paper, drawin' the first line up to the loop, I loop it 'round then back down an' cross it over. It took longer fo' me alone to complete it then with 'em an' it don't look so well, the line are all shaky an' the loops a little in the wron' spot- but it a G. Anyone could tell.
"Alrigh'," he says, "Do another one."
"But- you said."
