"Can ya tell me 'bout her, Cecile?" I ask, painfully quiet an' shy, as we still sittin' together, my tears lon' time dry. I hug my knees up to my chest, restin' my head right on top. I only be kept together if I stay so close to myself, soon as I let go, I might jus' unravel. Like those dusty ol' rags, jus' pull one strin' an' it'll all come down. I dun't wanna come down; I pull myself in even tighter.
I turn to look at 'er, . A slight breeze blows over me as I wait an' wait, bitin' my lip 'till I almos' bleed. I shouldn't have asked, but I don't regret it none. I wanna kno' everythin' 'bout her, 'specally now when I feel all alone. When I feel so guilty fo' not really bein' able to love the one person who I truly do. It don't make no sense, do it? Maybe I shoul' 'ear 'bout her, maybe it'll give me strength... or make me weaker. Maybe all 'er secrets should be kept so. Maybe it'll make me feel even mo' guilty- replacin' 'er with Cecile in my own little way. I dunno.
I dunno nothin'. An' I don't care. I jus' wanna hear- that all.
"You wanna 'ear 'bout you mother?" Her voice ain't much higher than a sigh, but I still hear it. I was waitin' fo' it, I guess.
"Can you tell me 'bout her? You was here when she was, righ?"
"Oh, chil' I was here much fore that. I was born 'ere, when you daddy was jus' nearin' 'is teen years."
I smile a little, picturin' my daddy youn', a scrawny little boy, no taller than me. He didn't have no power neither once.
"When she marry my daddy?
"He was 'bout 24, she you age, coulda been eighteen even."
Now I see 'er, with pretty dresses an' hair an' eyes jus' like mine. Dnacin' at all them dances with all them boys, dressed up real nice. Daddy was probably the prince to 'er then, cause at this time he was all innocent still, no meanness in 'em. That had to 'ave been what it was like, I sure. With mother real kind, keepin' 'em innocent 'till 'er death.
"Oh Cecile, I so badly wanna kno' what she like. Please tell me."
Cecile look sideways at me, 'er eyes suddenly all sad, 'er lips reflectin' the same emotion.
"Oh chil', oh Corinne." She sighs gently to the wind, starin' blankly up at the sky. Finally, she speak. "You wanna kno' the truth 'bout you mother dear or the lie?"
I blink at her, confused, my brain speedin' to catch up. The truth... A lie? What... Realization dawns on me, an' I suddenly feel like I fallin' inta a big, deep black hole with no way out.
I turn to look at 'er, . A slight breeze blows over me as I wait an' wait, bitin' my lip 'till I almos' bleed. I shouldn't have asked, but I don't regret it none. I wanna kno' everythin' 'bout her, 'specally now when I feel all alone. When I feel so guilty fo' not really bein' able to love the one person who I truly do. It don't make no sense, do it? Maybe I shoul' 'ear 'bout her, maybe it'll give me strength... or make me weaker. Maybe all 'er secrets should be kept so. Maybe it'll make me feel even mo' guilty- replacin' 'er with Cecile in my own little way. I dunno.
I dunno nothin'. An' I don't care. I jus' wanna hear- that all.
"You wanna 'ear 'bout you mother?" Her voice ain't much higher than a sigh, but I still hear it. I was waitin' fo' it, I guess.
"Can you tell me 'bout her? You was here when she was, righ?"
"Oh, chil' I was here much fore that. I was born 'ere, when you daddy was jus' nearin' 'is teen years."
I smile a little, picturin' my daddy youn', a scrawny little boy, no taller than me. He didn't have no power neither once.
"When she marry my daddy?
"He was 'bout 24, she you age, coulda been eighteen even."
Now I see 'er, with pretty dresses an' hair an' eyes jus' like mine. Dnacin' at all them dances with all them boys, dressed up real nice. Daddy was probably the prince to 'er then, cause at this time he was all innocent still, no meanness in 'em. That had to 'ave been what it was like, I sure. With mother real kind, keepin' 'em innocent 'till 'er death.
"Oh Cecile, I so badly wanna kno' what she like. Please tell me."
Cecile look sideways at me, 'er eyes suddenly all sad, 'er lips reflectin' the same emotion.
"Oh chil', oh Corinne." She sighs gently to the wind, starin' blankly up at the sky. Finally, she speak. "You wanna kno' the truth 'bout you mother dear or the lie?"
I blink at her, confused, my brain speedin' to catch up. The truth... A lie? What... Realization dawns on me, an' I suddenly feel like I fallin' inta a big, deep black hole with no way out.