metal in the woods last night. I went because I wanted to remind myself that everything doesn't always have to be some kind of social chess game. that sometimes things are as simple as you let them be. I love music, and being in the woods in the summertime, and so I went to listen to music in the woods in the summertime. simple as that.
I wanted to leave before I even got there. things with chris were awkward, both of us fumbling, not sure how we were supposed to act in the aftermath of our reconciliation. it worked itself out as things between us always do, after we'd given up. drank a few beers and slammed into him in the mosh pit and he smiled and I smiled. we clinked beer bottles and all the posturing and awkwardness seemed unimportant again.
after the generator shut off I sat alone by the fire smoking a cigarette, finishing my beer. looked up and there was spencer standing on the other side. he was alone too. before I knew what I was doing I was standing next to him, closer than we'd been in almost 3 years. hey, spencer, I said. like there was no reason not to. like this was an everyday occurrence, not an earth shattering event. hey, he said back.
we made smalltalk for a couple of minutes, how have you beens and what are you up tos and appropriately vague replies. there was a moment of silence, not an awkward one, and I turned and looked at him for the first time.
oh my god you grew a beard, I said.
after all the wondering, the imagining of what I would say to him if I had the chance... that's what came out of my mouth in the moment. "oh my god, you grew a beard". after that everything was okay.
maybe mutantfest won't be so bad after all.
I wanted to leave before I even got there. things with chris were awkward, both of us fumbling, not sure how we were supposed to act in the aftermath of our reconciliation. it worked itself out as things between us always do, after we'd given up. drank a few beers and slammed into him in the mosh pit and he smiled and I smiled. we clinked beer bottles and all the posturing and awkwardness seemed unimportant again.
after the generator shut off I sat alone by the fire smoking a cigarette, finishing my beer. looked up and there was spencer standing on the other side. he was alone too. before I knew what I was doing I was standing next to him, closer than we'd been in almost 3 years. hey, spencer, I said. like there was no reason not to. like this was an everyday occurrence, not an earth shattering event. hey, he said back.
we made smalltalk for a couple of minutes, how have you beens and what are you up tos and appropriately vague replies. there was a moment of silence, not an awkward one, and I turned and looked at him for the first time.
oh my god you grew a beard, I said.
after all the wondering, the imagining of what I would say to him if I had the chance... that's what came out of my mouth in the moment. "oh my god, you grew a beard". after that everything was okay.
maybe mutantfest won't be so bad after all.
