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No one will notice. Even though my pain has greatly increased. No one can see pain. They are just another few bruises that will become part of the pattern on my body. Nothing to obvious except that they are a darker color, and i know what they are. But just because i can see the difference between the old bruises and the brand new ones doesnt mean at all that people will notice.
I dont really care if people notice. If they do, good for them. Its not like that is going to help me one little bit. Oh your sorry? Well maybe i can use that next time it happens to me. See it doesnt work. Why dont I leave him you ask? Cause he will hunt me down and force me to become what i dont want to be. Dominic is dangerous, anyone can see, and once you become a part of the group you can never not get away from the group. Its a permanent thing. Its ok i am fine with it... I have to be.
"Mirror mirror on the wall who is the fairest of them all" I say, my hands meeting in the mirror.
"Your mother" it says back to me "obviously not you. Your dirty, your bloody, your hair is a big mess, your just disappointing. Are you expecting to amount to something greater? Well dont cause you wont make it. You'll just end up crashing and burning. Your disappointing to your mother and to charlie, especially charlie. You are dragging him down, you forced him away. Get out of my face, you disgust me" It is true, all of it. There is dried blood on my face, my hair is a mess, there are tear stains on my cheeks. My whole body is aching from everything that i have been through. I am not completely healed from the accident and the beating didnt make it any better.
I splash cold water on my face and wash away the dried blood. I brush my hair and pull it up in a pony tail to get it off my neck. This is my routine. The only thing different here is that it is 2 o'clock instead of 9 at night.
I dont know what charlie would do if he saw me here. I wish he was here to hold me. A girl needs someone to hold her every once in a while, so that she can cry without a reason. I am pitying my self. You are the one who put your self in this situation. But Dominic would find me if i left him. He would hunt me down. I think i am in pain now, no way, if i left i would probably never recover.
But thats the way it goes.... isnt it?
No one will notice. Even though my pain has greatly increased. No one can see pain. They are just another few bruises that will become part of the pattern on my body. Nothing to obvious except that they are a darker color, and i know what they are. But just because i can see the difference between the old bruises and the brand new ones doesnt mean at all that people will notice.
I dont really care if people notice. If they do, good for them. Its not like that is going to help me one little bit. Oh your sorry? Well maybe i can use that next time it happens to me. See it doesnt work. Why dont I leave him you ask? Cause he will hunt me down and force me to become what i dont want to be. Dominic is dangerous, anyone can see, and once you become a part of the group you can never not get away from the group. Its a permanent thing. Its ok i am fine with it... I have to be.
"Mirror mirror on the wall who is the fairest of them all" I say, my hands meeting in the mirror.
"Your mother" it says back to me "obviously not you. Your dirty, your bloody, your hair is a big mess, your just disappointing. Are you expecting to amount to something greater? Well dont cause you wont make it. You'll just end up crashing and burning. Your disappointing to your mother and to charlie, especially charlie. You are dragging him down, you forced him away. Get out of my face, you disgust me" It is true, all of it. There is dried blood on my face, my hair is a mess, there are tear stains on my cheeks. My whole body is aching from everything that i have been through. I am not completely healed from the accident and the beating didnt make it any better.
I splash cold water on my face and wash away the dried blood. I brush my hair and pull it up in a pony tail to get it off my neck. This is my routine. The only thing different here is that it is 2 o'clock instead of 9 at night.
I dont know what charlie would do if he saw me here. I wish he was here to hold me. A girl needs someone to hold her every once in a while, so that she can cry without a reason. I am pitying my self. You are the one who put your self in this situation. But Dominic would find me if i left him. He would hunt me down. I think i am in pain now, no way, if i left i would probably never recover.
But thats the way it goes.... isnt it?
