07/09/10 - Sometimes you just have to let go of the brakes and carve the downhill, trusting that you're either ready for whatever pops up around the bend or that you're at peace with the life you've lived (should it come to a sudden stop to the sound of scraping metal).
I'm not quite there yet, but that's where I'm trying to get to. Letting go is so, so hard, especially after a life lived of maintaining control, being just safe enough, and otherwise riding between the lines. There are past lives in my wake, pieces of my past in a path behind me that are proof positive that I can, and do, throw caution to the wind and start fresh. It's time again.
Punctuated Equilibrium. This is how the world works, and this is how I've lived. It's not about slow, gradual anything- it's about sudden cataclysmic changes followed by long periods of regrowth, rediscovery, and a new balance of forces. I am my own giant space rock.
I'm not quite there yet, but that's where I'm trying to get to. Letting go is so, so hard, especially after a life lived of maintaining control, being just safe enough, and otherwise riding between the lines. There are past lives in my wake, pieces of my past in a path behind me that are proof positive that I can, and do, throw caution to the wind and start fresh. It's time again.
Punctuated Equilibrium. This is how the world works, and this is how I've lived. It's not about slow, gradual anything- it's about sudden cataclysmic changes followed by long periods of regrowth, rediscovery, and a new balance of forces. I am my own giant space rock.
