07/01/10 - My Brain:
I shouldn't have taken two weeks off of writing here every day. I've decided to start for real, writing the story of two scarcely-believable characters and their paths through life. Both characters are me, the stories are as real as I feel like telling them, and no names will be changed to protect anyone.
Of course, with the internet as it is, all it would take is one well-placed click to bring my life's work (the work of getting away with everything) into the harsh light of day. Maybe it's time for that, though. I've been embracing a new way of living, at least in theory, and honesty keeps working its way to the front of the line. I'm afraid to really let everything out there, though. The carefully constructed and maintained landscape that is my public image (or my image of my public image) would take a thrashing from the truth, for sure.
Perhaps I should clarify the "two character" thing. I have lived my life in constant tension. Not in some truly split-personality way, but as a life's work of being both Id and Ego, letting the daytime world see the upright citizen while the nighttime world gets the rock star and all the fixings. For years, these aspects of my self were cleanly split, each to their own territory, mingling only when absolutely necessary. But every now and then, under either great fatigue, unavoidable necessity, or boredome, there's some crossover (often followed by damage control).
Often it's when the entourage has had just too much to drink and smoke, and there's some technical dillemma that requires my engineer brain to kick in and save the day. I usually shake my head clear, examine the problem, then say something brilliant such as, "Well here's your problem- this bong has a carb!". Every party crowd has their MacGuyver.
The other way around isn't as convenient, though, such as letting my self-indulgence take over at a funeral, then doing the life of the party thing at a decidedly non-Irish wake. Oh well, even the Lutherans need their asses slapped every now and then...
I shouldn't have taken two weeks off of writing here every day. I've decided to start for real, writing the story of two scarcely-believable characters and their paths through life. Both characters are me, the stories are as real as I feel like telling them, and no names will be changed to protect anyone.
Of course, with the internet as it is, all it would take is one well-placed click to bring my life's work (the work of getting away with everything) into the harsh light of day. Maybe it's time for that, though. I've been embracing a new way of living, at least in theory, and honesty keeps working its way to the front of the line. I'm afraid to really let everything out there, though. The carefully constructed and maintained landscape that is my public image (or my image of my public image) would take a thrashing from the truth, for sure.
Perhaps I should clarify the "two character" thing. I have lived my life in constant tension. Not in some truly split-personality way, but as a life's work of being both Id and Ego, letting the daytime world see the upright citizen while the nighttime world gets the rock star and all the fixings. For years, these aspects of my self were cleanly split, each to their own territory, mingling only when absolutely necessary. But every now and then, under either great fatigue, unavoidable necessity, or boredome, there's some crossover (often followed by damage control).
Often it's when the entourage has had just too much to drink and smoke, and there's some technical dillemma that requires my engineer brain to kick in and save the day. I usually shake my head clear, examine the problem, then say something brilliant such as, "Well here's your problem- this bong has a carb!". Every party crowd has their MacGuyver.
The other way around isn't as convenient, though, such as letting my self-indulgence take over at a funeral, then doing the life of the party thing at a decidedly non-Irish wake. Oh well, even the Lutherans need their asses slapped every now and then...
