Listen - why that email sounds like b.s. is because it is b.s. How can I be honest when I don't want to be with you anymore? We were not using condoms - at the point you put your money where your mouth is and go in for the long haul, or either you get out. I'm done with casual sex. You were my last.
Do you want to really know why? Your frequency is like a skittish bird, constantly hitting its wings against the bars of its Victorian cage. I need someone calm - someone relaxed - someone with my own frequency. My frequency is like that massive turtle from The Never-Ending Story. I move slow and I ponder. And I breathe. You're quick to excite, quick to be offended, quick to everything.
What makes me feel guilty is that this is the SECOND time I did this to you. The first time I sent you a gawky awkward break-up email, and now I'm sending you the same email years later, but maturity's smoothed it into a softer blow. But it's still the same B.S. You're skittish and you remind me of my mother. That's why I don't want to see you anymore.
*************************************************************************************
"What kind of internet hook-up do you have?"
"Uh, excuse me?"
"Internet. Fios, Broadband, X50..."
"I - I just want to buy a TV."
"Yeah, but you're gonna hook your TV up to the internet, right?"
"Uh, no. I just want to watch TV."
"Well, let me know what kind of internet you have, just in case."
"I don't want to hook my TV up to the internet. I just want to watch TV."
"This TV hooks up to the internet."
"That's great, but I don't want to do that."
"You sure?"
"Yes, I'm pretty sure."
"You get a free internet cable, though. You want the internet cable?"
"I just-- ... Um. Yeah. Okay, I'll take the cable."
"Okay, what kind of internet hook-up do you have?"
BA-DUM-BUM!
Do you want to really know why? Your frequency is like a skittish bird, constantly hitting its wings against the bars of its Victorian cage. I need someone calm - someone relaxed - someone with my own frequency. My frequency is like that massive turtle from The Never-Ending Story. I move slow and I ponder. And I breathe. You're quick to excite, quick to be offended, quick to everything.
What makes me feel guilty is that this is the SECOND time I did this to you. The first time I sent you a gawky awkward break-up email, and now I'm sending you the same email years later, but maturity's smoothed it into a softer blow. But it's still the same B.S. You're skittish and you remind me of my mother. That's why I don't want to see you anymore.
*************************************************************************************
"What kind of internet hook-up do you have?"
"Uh, excuse me?"
"Internet. Fios, Broadband, X50..."
"I - I just want to buy a TV."
"Yeah, but you're gonna hook your TV up to the internet, right?"
"Uh, no. I just want to watch TV."
"Well, let me know what kind of internet you have, just in case."
"I don't want to hook my TV up to the internet. I just want to watch TV."
"This TV hooks up to the internet."
"That's great, but I don't want to do that."
"You sure?"
"Yes, I'm pretty sure."
"You get a free internet cable, though. You want the internet cable?"
"I just-- ... Um. Yeah. Okay, I'll take the cable."
"Okay, what kind of internet hook-up do you have?"
BA-DUM-BUM!
