I don't like the way you tell me that I shouldn't be looking for love, that I'm smarter to just go to school. Why is it I should gain only education, reject all fun and romance and real life experiences; simply because they made mistakes by throwing their futures away in pursuit of the same things they advise me to avoid. However, I don't think that a life, "successful" only through education and occupation, is the one I want. I want romance too, I want to have fun. I want one day to look back and say "I remember when I did..."


Today i don't want love. i don't need romance, i don't even want you to buy me flowers. today i need physicality with someone i find attractive. that's pretty much it. today, i want you to make my body shake with fire, i want you to leave me breathless. for just today, i want only your body setting of the chemical reactions mine has begun to miss.
but if you miss these few moments, you miss them forever.
it's just too bad i've never met you.


i'm tired of cold nights. i'm tired of empty kisses. i'm tired of my heart screaming "alone' in a crowded room. you can hold me close, heart beat drilling holes in my chest so that you may reach me, but i feel nothing. the hottest touch leaves me just as cold as rainy winds. your love cannot touch me, no matter how far i reach. you are just empty words and empty motions. a facade of feeling. i want someone of my own to love. someone who can touch me. i want only to be complete.


on new years eve, we blasted "somebody to love" at full volume, singing with such sincerity. it's been months, but my complaints remain the same.
i still feel like a heartless.