After a couple of years on the "make", nights and weekends spent searching for the one or really anyone to hook-up with I became a sexual camel. A born-again virgin. My ladies parts got no use. And it was a lack of trying. Sure there were the half-hearted attempts at on-line dating, but my personality never truly came across in the standard profile. I needed to rif off another person's vibe. My acerbic, sarcastic yet sweet (at times) demeanor may come off as arrogant, aloof or any number of off-putting characteristics. Also, I'm a black girl looking to date a non-black guy. It was just what I was used to, nothing against my people. It was a tough road when I got back into town.
Yes, I'd had sex with two guys, but they were within my circle of friends and I was loathe to do it again. I didn't want to hurt anyone and I didn't want to make things awkward or weird. Like any group of old friends there had already been a lot of hooks-ups to varying degrees and I didn't want to add to the already incestous pile.
Not to mention that since I didn't have a steady workplace it wasn't like I was meeting a constant stream of "fresh meat". And I didn't have the kind of friends that were eager to set me up with anyone, not that they knew any eligible men. I would say to my girlfriends with boyfriends, 'Hey doesn't your guy, have any single guy friends'?. The answer was always no, his friends are married or he doesn't have any friends. NO FRIENDS. WTF?????!!!!
I was at the end of my rope, no amount of self gratification was going to ameliorate the situation that I found myself in. And that's when it happened on a day that was unexceptional. At a food truck of all places. There he was waiting for his order of Korean tacos. I should mention that I had lost any "game" that I'd ever had and that I didn't know what flirting was anymore. I was like one of the nerds at the back of the gym in a John Hughes film, in a back brace and headgear. Or at least that is how I felt.
He fit the bill, as they say. Tall. check. Dark hair. Check. Easy smile. Check. Non-skinny jeans. Check. No wedding ring double check (always). He smiled at me. WHAT? Said hello. Again, WHAT? This man did not follow the rulebook. I said hi, in the way that us New Yorkers do, nicely, but not too nice, because who knows what kind of kook is
Yes, I'd had sex with two guys, but they were within my circle of friends and I was loathe to do it again. I didn't want to hurt anyone and I didn't want to make things awkward or weird. Like any group of old friends there had already been a lot of hooks-ups to varying degrees and I didn't want to add to the already incestous pile.
Not to mention that since I didn't have a steady workplace it wasn't like I was meeting a constant stream of "fresh meat". And I didn't have the kind of friends that were eager to set me up with anyone, not that they knew any eligible men. I would say to my girlfriends with boyfriends, 'Hey doesn't your guy, have any single guy friends'?. The answer was always no, his friends are married or he doesn't have any friends. NO FRIENDS. WTF?????!!!!
I was at the end of my rope, no amount of self gratification was going to ameliorate the situation that I found myself in. And that's when it happened on a day that was unexceptional. At a food truck of all places. There he was waiting for his order of Korean tacos. I should mention that I had lost any "game" that I'd ever had and that I didn't know what flirting was anymore. I was like one of the nerds at the back of the gym in a John Hughes film, in a back brace and headgear. Or at least that is how I felt.
He fit the bill, as they say. Tall. check. Dark hair. Check. Easy smile. Check. Non-skinny jeans. Check. No wedding ring double check (always). He smiled at me. WHAT? Said hello. Again, WHAT? This man did not follow the rulebook. I said hi, in the way that us New Yorkers do, nicely, but not too nice, because who knows what kind of kook is
