it back to the den.
i stopped in the doorway taking in the only room in the apartment i actually lived out of. It wasn't that big and didn't have much in it. My desk with my laptop and printer, along with the computer chair on one end of the room, a sofa that i barely used on the other end of the room for quick midnight naps, its become obsolete since I usually fall asleep at the desk, a stereo on the floor along with a few pairs of pants and a couple of shirts for a quick change. The rest of the apartment belonged to her.
I hovered around my computer desk for the majority of the day, eating a little when i felt the need. I was determined to write something today, something about her. Linkin Park's 'numb' pounded into my ears as i thought. 'should i just delete this character all together? Start something new? After all you originally wanted this character to be an extension of this girl Francine, but if you you don't know anything about her...' "it won't work. I know." I answered myself.
The chorus of 'Numb' filled the room "I've become so numb I can't feel you there, become so tired so much more aware, I'm becoming this, all I want to do is be more like me and be less like you. Can't you see that you're smothering me, holding too tightly..." i stop singing along to the song, i was struck by an idea, an image rather. the image of when i first saw Francine and really looked at her in the stairwell. That look of fear and loneliness in her eyes, the way she clenched her knees into her chest as if to brace herself from a storm. But she never looked like that in class. In the two classes that i saw her she looked completely fine, completely together. I sat down for the first time that day with an intention. i started typing.
It was about five o' clock when i felt the need to order take out, and eat something that resembled a real meal. i surpressed the need because i know she'd kill me for it when she came in with some gourmet something from some big restaurant. Finished recording my burst of insight i found my mind wandering. The first detour my mind made was of course thing of food i wasn't allowed to eat. A few irrelevant thoughts later, my mind again came to wonder about my newest pupil, Francine. 'I wonder if she e-mailed me back yet.' i thought carelessly as i went to check my e-mail. I had a few other e-mails but i disregarded them as none of them struck out to me except a particular e-mail from: FRAN_UN-SEEN.
I read the e-mail with care, looking for anything that would give away parts of her reasons for being so meloncoly. I felt the corner of my mouth pull downward
i stopped in the doorway taking in the only room in the apartment i actually lived out of. It wasn't that big and didn't have much in it. My desk with my laptop and printer, along with the computer chair on one end of the room, a sofa that i barely used on the other end of the room for quick midnight naps, its become obsolete since I usually fall asleep at the desk, a stereo on the floor along with a few pairs of pants and a couple of shirts for a quick change. The rest of the apartment belonged to her.
I hovered around my computer desk for the majority of the day, eating a little when i felt the need. I was determined to write something today, something about her. Linkin Park's 'numb' pounded into my ears as i thought. 'should i just delete this character all together? Start something new? After all you originally wanted this character to be an extension of this girl Francine, but if you you don't know anything about her...' "it won't work. I know." I answered myself.
The chorus of 'Numb' filled the room "I've become so numb I can't feel you there, become so tired so much more aware, I'm becoming this, all I want to do is be more like me and be less like you. Can't you see that you're smothering me, holding too tightly..." i stop singing along to the song, i was struck by an idea, an image rather. the image of when i first saw Francine and really looked at her in the stairwell. That look of fear and loneliness in her eyes, the way she clenched her knees into her chest as if to brace herself from a storm. But she never looked like that in class. In the two classes that i saw her she looked completely fine, completely together. I sat down for the first time that day with an intention. i started typing.
It was about five o' clock when i felt the need to order take out, and eat something that resembled a real meal. i surpressed the need because i know she'd kill me for it when she came in with some gourmet something from some big restaurant. Finished recording my burst of insight i found my mind wandering. The first detour my mind made was of course thing of food i wasn't allowed to eat. A few irrelevant thoughts later, my mind again came to wonder about my newest pupil, Francine. 'I wonder if she e-mailed me back yet.' i thought carelessly as i went to check my e-mail. I had a few other e-mails but i disregarded them as none of them struck out to me except a particular e-mail from: FRAN_UN-SEEN.
I read the e-mail with care, looking for anything that would give away parts of her reasons for being so meloncoly. I felt the corner of my mouth pull downward
