dad,
you fought so hard to get custody of her, threatened to move hell and earth and even have people incarcerated if they defied you, and you won. you snatched her from an unhealthy and unhappy life and brought her here where for once you had all the time in the world to spend with her.
I left my life behind to make your claim legitimate, to act in the parental supporting role when you had to travel for work, and together we won. she moved in.
it's a damn good thing I came, although I had no fucking IDEA what I was signing up for. luckily - no, scratch that, luck had nothing to do with it. with the kind of strength and resourcefulness and love that we sure as hell didn't learn from you we made a life for ourselves out of the broken pieces you left us. we drew warmth, happiness, and honesty from the stones you cast and became a family. we turned your mausoleum of dust and crumbs and flickering tv lights into a home...
...no, not with the love and support of our father, but in spite of its absence.
at 24 I've lived a lifetime of disappointment with you, and it ceased to matter to me long ago whether you were supportive of my life or even present in it. but you are the primary parent and guardian of an beautiful, intelligent, talented, amazing teenage girl and you don't know the first thing about her life.
you don't know that she loses her appetite when she's nervous or that she finds writing cathartic but hates her english class. you don't know that she sleeps too much when she's overwhelmed or the name of her best friend or what cd she listens to when she's sad.
you have the opportunity to know these things, to know her, and you're throwing it away. honestly, I condemn you for that more than anything you've ever done to me. you should have learned the first time.
signed, sincerely, me.
you fought so hard to get custody of her, threatened to move hell and earth and even have people incarcerated if they defied you, and you won. you snatched her from an unhealthy and unhappy life and brought her here where for once you had all the time in the world to spend with her.
I left my life behind to make your claim legitimate, to act in the parental supporting role when you had to travel for work, and together we won. she moved in.
it's a damn good thing I came, although I had no fucking IDEA what I was signing up for. luckily - no, scratch that, luck had nothing to do with it. with the kind of strength and resourcefulness and love that we sure as hell didn't learn from you we made a life for ourselves out of the broken pieces you left us. we drew warmth, happiness, and honesty from the stones you cast and became a family. we turned your mausoleum of dust and crumbs and flickering tv lights into a home...
...no, not with the love and support of our father, but in spite of its absence.
at 24 I've lived a lifetime of disappointment with you, and it ceased to matter to me long ago whether you were supportive of my life or even present in it. but you are the primary parent and guardian of an beautiful, intelligent, talented, amazing teenage girl and you don't know the first thing about her life.
you don't know that she loses her appetite when she's nervous or that she finds writing cathartic but hates her english class. you don't know that she sleeps too much when she's overwhelmed or the name of her best friend or what cd she listens to when she's sad.
you have the opportunity to know these things, to know her, and you're throwing it away. honestly, I condemn you for that more than anything you've ever done to me. you should have learned the first time.
signed, sincerely, me.
