December 25th, 2016--Tokyo, Japan
First of all, let me tell you this. You know that saying, do what you love and love will find you? That's a total crock of shit. I'm not ot good at many things, but if there's one thing I've mastered, it's doing whatever the hell I want please, whenever the hell i want to. My life has, for the most part, been one long adventure of me doing what I love
Yet, here I am, 5 days before my 35th birthday, alone in a vacation rental in a Tokyo suburb, about to finish a bottle of wine. Alone. In a tiny Japanese bathtub. Christmas day, 2016.
I don't celebrate Christmas. But the nostalgia of my youth is still present enough to make me feel feelings that aren't actually warranted. What can I say, I'm a product of American dystopia. It's not an imagined place. Perhaps you grew up in dystopia too. Maybe you know what it's like. Middle class, white American family. Hard working parents who disapprove of your interests, which seems completely prejudiced at the time. If only I had listened. But I didn't. I never did. He'll, I still don't.
Some lessons are better left unlearned. At least that's what I tell myself. But then again, here I am, utterly confused by my loneliness in the most densley populated city in the world. I'm not even sure how that's possible. But I'm sure as hell ready to get to the bottom of it. I can tell you this, being alone in major metropolitan is vastly different from the solitude you find in the midst if nature. I know I'm not alone in this line of feeling.
First of all, let me tell you this. You know that saying, do what you love and love will find you? That's a total crock of shit. I'm not ot good at many things, but if there's one thing I've mastered, it's doing whatever the hell I want please, whenever the hell i want to. My life has, for the most part, been one long adventure of me doing what I love
Yet, here I am, 5 days before my 35th birthday, alone in a vacation rental in a Tokyo suburb, about to finish a bottle of wine. Alone. In a tiny Japanese bathtub. Christmas day, 2016.
I don't celebrate Christmas. But the nostalgia of my youth is still present enough to make me feel feelings that aren't actually warranted. What can I say, I'm a product of American dystopia. It's not an imagined place. Perhaps you grew up in dystopia too. Maybe you know what it's like. Middle class, white American family. Hard working parents who disapprove of your interests, which seems completely prejudiced at the time. If only I had listened. But I didn't. I never did. He'll, I still don't.
Some lessons are better left unlearned. At least that's what I tell myself. But then again, here I am, utterly confused by my loneliness in the most densley populated city in the world. I'm not even sure how that's possible. But I'm sure as hell ready to get to the bottom of it. I can tell you this, being alone in major metropolitan is vastly different from the solitude you find in the midst if nature. I know I'm not alone in this line of feeling.
