Later on, I went about my day, and realized I had left my phone at his apartment. I was disappointed in myself for two reasons: first, that I had lost yet another cellphone--my third in three months--and that I had to figure out a way to get it back from Luke's place without looking needy.

Niki put it this way, once. That the worst part about being insecure, especially if you're a girl and it's a man who's giving you so much consternation, is his unawareness--he is oblivious--odds are that he has no freaking clue why you're asking him if he thinks you're needy because you left your phone at his apartment.

I could just picture myself walking up to his door and saying something really, really stupid, like "Just because I left my phone here doesn't mean I think we should exclusively see each other."

"What?"

"It just means that I'm forgetful and klutzy, it doesn't mean I'm harboring wishful feelings of seeing you again, soon."

"...What?"

"And just because I left my phone here all day doesn't mean I'm okay with you sleeping around with other guys, either. That's just not fair, because I've never had to compete for gay men, and they are so catty, and I don't stand a chance, and if that's what you feel like doing than you should just dump me right now so that you can have all the gay bar sex that you want! All I ask is that you give a little piece of me back--give me back my phone. And call me sometime, alright?"

".....alright."