Today Xavier told me that he is anorexic. I really didn't know what to do. So I cried for a little while. He loves me very much. He tells me everyday nearly. It's almost redundant but I never ever get tired of hearing it. Not to mention what a loss it would be if we lost some one as gorgeous as Xavier. He is a perfect man. Tall, beautiful hair, cute eyes, his hands.... Oh god his hands.... They look so wonderful. I just want to hold them all the time but I know how I would get if I held his hand. My hands would get all clammy... I would have a complete aneurysm if he even looked at me with any sort of interest. I am not that pretty. I kind of have a lisp. Not a real one. I kind of combine my Ss with THs. So I have been told it sounds cute. But I think Xavier would hate it. He really would. I never want him to hear my voice.... I love him. God. I love him so much...