Everything is worthy of time and thoughts right now, although I may not feel that way. The night in Roppongi at the club, the $40 haircut that took one hour but was great!!! and the third bowl of cereal I just consumed. Japanese milk and cereal, both of which I cannot understand, are foreign to me. No bike riding for me, just everyone else. A thin pad to sleep low on the ground is waiting for me to lay. My melancholy has become deep and at times overwhelming but is now leading to artistic thinking. I read, natural talent does not exist. People tell me often I am a natural at playing guitar. I plainly reply with a "thanks". Natural talent does not exist. Everyone can do it....That means I can change my skill whenever I want and maybe develop new passions. And you too. I came to the conclusion that I am far more balanced than I should be. I wont delete that last, "should be". I hate that, I have to fix that. I am socially balanced in terms of people I will save, or take a fall for. The rain prevented us..Improve on running, I feel I have accomplished. Like an iron bull with speed. Hahaha nice attempt at poetry. Stability I have mastered I feel. Mental stability, that is. Why do I feel Out of Circle. Above circle. Looking down on circle. The scent of citrus to my right. Directional smell. It is this smell that might come to me tonight when I am sleeping to interesting and ambient music on my thin pad low on the floor. My dreams might be that of which I am a farmer early in the morning as the sun rises in Florida. Florida Orange Juice. I am alone, picking citrus fruits from a ladder looking toward my untied boots and descent jeans. Maybe a straw hat and a piece of wheat from my mouth. A lifestyle I would not only not mind, but appreciate. Yep, that is my dream, i hope.
My first time dancing was GREAT. All my life I judged people who went to clubs and listened to that meaningless crap that never progresses. But the right mix of 90's american pop and rap and AC/DC/Aerosmith was great. And the beer!!!600yen for Fosters is the cheapest they offered. The girls! there was a great ratio 1:1. Small Latina type great short tight dress grinding so sexually I thought I might cum. I treated her as a person I would have sex with......Aggressive handling, pulling hair and even choking. Our sweaty bodies did not mind contact at all. But only in that environment. Anything else would have been worrisome. Maybe an hour or two of dancing with just her, we split. I leave and come back after breathing non-smoke filled air that the dirty nightlife of Roppongi has to offer. She approached head on, pinches me somewhere on my torso and says, hey with a nice smile. I looked as we passed each other and she vanished. Not that I am romantically or personally connected with her but I would have definitely exchanged emails. What if this gets out. I learned that the few times I had visual abstract thoughts of a body (mine?) that was highly disproportional, often when I am sick is called cortical homunculus.
My first time dancing was GREAT. All my life I judged people who went to clubs and listened to that meaningless crap that never progresses. But the right mix of 90's american pop and rap and AC/DC/Aerosmith was great. And the beer!!!600yen for Fosters is the cheapest they offered. The girls! there was a great ratio 1:1. Small Latina type great short tight dress grinding so sexually I thought I might cum. I treated her as a person I would have sex with......Aggressive handling, pulling hair and even choking. Our sweaty bodies did not mind contact at all. But only in that environment. Anything else would have been worrisome. Maybe an hour or two of dancing with just her, we split. I leave and come back after breathing non-smoke filled air that the dirty nightlife of Roppongi has to offer. She approached head on, pinches me somewhere on my torso and says, hey with a nice smile. I looked as we passed each other and she vanished. Not that I am romantically or personally connected with her but I would have definitely exchanged emails. What if this gets out. I learned that the few times I had visual abstract thoughts of a body (mine?) that was highly disproportional, often when I am sick is called cortical homunculus.
