Have you ever experienced a moment in your life when everything came to a standstill? where time slowed as if the entire universe held it's breath for that moment. That span of time that seemed so monumental that no one could ever describe it but the moment you can describe it, it's as if, you've defined everything. This moment that slows down so you can take in every last second of it is usually something more then something ordinary. like a kiss, that one kiss when two people, two spirits become entangled, every last tangible piece of them embrace each other with electricity, passion, and everything else that describes that spark of human touch. That was what I dreamed of, I wanted my moment to be that, that kiss. the kiss that told me finally, that love had gotten it's hands on me and grasped me tight so that I would never slip into a loneliness below us. I would be above and beyond late nights alone, instead i would drift above every nightmare, every shadow in the arms of that person i shared that kiss with. as if my lips were a contract and his a pen and the second they came in contacted, the contract had been signed and eternal love and happiness was the reward.

but the universe didn't want to hold it's breath for that moment. at least for myself. it held it's breath for shooting, my brother's shooting. when i stood there, the man gripped the gun. the pistol went off and the bullet sped through the frigid air and struck my brother in the chest. that's when the universe decided to exhale, and it released not just time but chaos. sirens and my mother's sobs, screaming and all. that wasn't just my moment but the worst, most dreadful moment in my entire life. why? well simply because that set of the unraveling of my family.