the night before i become clean. Who would've ever thought it'd resort to this? to me being affected from methmouth. Maybe i've been given all the freedom i've ever wanted but not the responsibility i've earned. Obviously 'm not responsible. It's my life and I need to control it!!! I will fix this though, I need to be more wary and aware. I need to know everything, do everything, become myself. Who am i? I need help, I cant do this all by myself, perhaps call vicky, get into god again. But what if methmouth goes away and I come back to my old habits? How do i know im even strong enough to overcome urges? I mean sure i've been clean off meth for about two weeks but still.. marijuana everyday. I can't even get through this night let alone, whenever my methmouth gets better, it'll feel so good to inhale that herb. I need something...but what? what am i missing? if i get what im missing, im left with even more dissatisfaction.