Okay, alright, fine, I get it. But come on, don't we all want to be superheroes? And really, a superhero is just the man with the bigger gun. In a metaphorical sense, usually. We'd all call Astro Aldie a superhero, I'd like to see any of the ladies and gentlemen present today to duplicate his feats on Gerillion 4. So why not me? I mean, I just turned the figurative into literal.
But isn't this the FUTURE? The one all those historical "video films" dreamt of, but never got quite right? The visuals seemed pretty accurate to today's standards. Can anyone here REALLY tell me how the Virtual Visage actually works? I don't think so. I saw the signs, I knew it was experimental. But sometimes we need a little pick-me-up.
Granted, the first few were easy. It was just me, Captain Rock Thundercrush and a gun, versus Earth's greatest villains. I fought every virtual cliche in the book. It turns out Hitler can't fire for shit and Pol Pot just tried to run. But Admiral Rock "Lightning" Thundercrush doesn't just dole out mercy like that dolt Astro Aldie. The ENTIRE VIRTUAL WORLD was at stake, and President George W. Reagan had to be stopped somehow. And when the space man comes at them with the space gun, they acted genuinely terrified. So maybe I wanted it to be a challenge.
I swear Gorgulax the Bone Negator was not my first choice. But Chief Space General Jock "Thunder" Lightningcrush saw an OPPORTUNITY. So I'm REALLY sorry he got the gun from me.
I'm REALLY sorry I didn't accept that all those warning signs were actually accurate. And yes, we all remember that pretty bad millennium under the cold space metal fist of the Bone Negator, but wasn't it FUN?
And isn't the extermination of a pupkitten space orphanage just a little... on the weak side? I mean, Gorgulax DID exterminate an entire arm of the galaxy. You know, when he was real.
Trust me, it'll be a fun story to tell your kids after they're done searching the wreckage that leveled Hope City. Besides, you should be thanking me. What if that was the entire robot uprising everyone feared?
So we should all just laugh this off. And maybe knock this death sentence down a peg or two.
But isn't this the FUTURE? The one all those historical "video films" dreamt of, but never got quite right? The visuals seemed pretty accurate to today's standards. Can anyone here REALLY tell me how the Virtual Visage actually works? I don't think so. I saw the signs, I knew it was experimental. But sometimes we need a little pick-me-up.
Granted, the first few were easy. It was just me, Captain Rock Thundercrush and a gun, versus Earth's greatest villains. I fought every virtual cliche in the book. It turns out Hitler can't fire for shit and Pol Pot just tried to run. But Admiral Rock "Lightning" Thundercrush doesn't just dole out mercy like that dolt Astro Aldie. The ENTIRE VIRTUAL WORLD was at stake, and President George W. Reagan had to be stopped somehow. And when the space man comes at them with the space gun, they acted genuinely terrified. So maybe I wanted it to be a challenge.
I swear Gorgulax the Bone Negator was not my first choice. But Chief Space General Jock "Thunder" Lightningcrush saw an OPPORTUNITY. So I'm REALLY sorry he got the gun from me.
I'm REALLY sorry I didn't accept that all those warning signs were actually accurate. And yes, we all remember that pretty bad millennium under the cold space metal fist of the Bone Negator, but wasn't it FUN?
And isn't the extermination of a pupkitten space orphanage just a little... on the weak side? I mean, Gorgulax DID exterminate an entire arm of the galaxy. You know, when he was real.
Trust me, it'll be a fun story to tell your kids after they're done searching the wreckage that leveled Hope City. Besides, you should be thanking me. What if that was the entire robot uprising everyone feared?
So we should all just laugh this off. And maybe knock this death sentence down a peg or two.
