"so what happens when you pop more than a few st john's wort capsules?
I mean, they say it's the number one prescribed antidepressant in germany, so, something badass has got to go down, right? it's gotta be like, i dunno, like, taking at least one and a half xanax, right? I took a xanax once when leslie cohn was home from boarding school and had just came from her aunt's thanksgiving dinner. She said everybody there had been arguing about her newly dead grandad's belongings and since her aunt was already three sheets to the wind and up shit's creek without a paddle, or whatever, she started handing out pharmaceuticals to everyone who wasn't sitting at the 'kids' table. Les was at the kids' table but her dad was supposedly on the phone screaming at his ex about how she'd have to wait to see leslie till they were done with his family's bullshit. Not an exact quote, but you get the idea. I mean, so, yeah. Leslie said that while her aunt and uncle were squabbling over some set of her grandad's encyclopedias, she snuck over, grabbed the pill off her dad's plate, wrapped it in a napkin and pocketed it. When she came over, she told me to take it since she wasn't sure if it might have reverse affects on her, cause I guess she read somewhere that if happy people take medicine meant for depressed people, it actually makes them super super sad. I laughed in her face. I don't remember if I laughed cause I thought she was kidding or because I have no idea what she meant by it and if you know me you know that when I'm nervous I laugh like a goddamned hysterical.. Was she really trying to make me think she was happy? Or was she saying that I must be sad, or what? But what she said, like, the words themselves, they kinda make sense, right? Cause like, tons of my friends who dont have ADHD ask to 'borrow' my aderol, and they put a shit ton of that shit up their noses and get amped up like it's coke or something. you know, and i have to take it just so my stupid brain slows down enough to where i can think for a sec.. to take tests and study and be quiet in church and whatnot. Putting it up my nose doesnt do a damn thing but make the skin between my eyes itch and my nostril hairs feel like tinsel. I wonder what my life would be like if my dad didnt make me start taking this stuff, if like, i dont know, maybe i figured out a way to concentrate without having to feel like a zombie sometimes. That shit, feeling like a zombie, i mean, that makes you feel kind of down, like you could use a pharmaceutical or two. That's why I'm asking really, cause, see, I'm kind of scared to start poppin the pills my mom has in her cabinet, i mean, like, i've seen what they can do, plus, like, i can't even pronounce whatever the hell it is they're called haha. but seriously, like, she was super sad and taking pills designed to make a sad person happy, but, i mean, all i can say is, no thanks. so, i'm asking, cause, i want to be happier than i have been lately and i'm thinking i should take it slow, like, work my way in to the heavier shit.
I mean, they say it's the number one prescribed antidepressant in germany, so, something badass has got to go down, right? it's gotta be like, i dunno, like, taking at least one and a half xanax, right? I took a xanax once when leslie cohn was home from boarding school and had just came from her aunt's thanksgiving dinner. She said everybody there had been arguing about her newly dead grandad's belongings and since her aunt was already three sheets to the wind and up shit's creek without a paddle, or whatever, she started handing out pharmaceuticals to everyone who wasn't sitting at the 'kids' table. Les was at the kids' table but her dad was supposedly on the phone screaming at his ex about how she'd have to wait to see leslie till they were done with his family's bullshit. Not an exact quote, but you get the idea. I mean, so, yeah. Leslie said that while her aunt and uncle were squabbling over some set of her grandad's encyclopedias, she snuck over, grabbed the pill off her dad's plate, wrapped it in a napkin and pocketed it. When she came over, she told me to take it since she wasn't sure if it might have reverse affects on her, cause I guess she read somewhere that if happy people take medicine meant for depressed people, it actually makes them super super sad. I laughed in her face. I don't remember if I laughed cause I thought she was kidding or because I have no idea what she meant by it and if you know me you know that when I'm nervous I laugh like a goddamned hysterical.. Was she really trying to make me think she was happy? Or was she saying that I must be sad, or what? But what she said, like, the words themselves, they kinda make sense, right? Cause like, tons of my friends who dont have ADHD ask to 'borrow' my aderol, and they put a shit ton of that shit up their noses and get amped up like it's coke or something. you know, and i have to take it just so my stupid brain slows down enough to where i can think for a sec.. to take tests and study and be quiet in church and whatnot. Putting it up my nose doesnt do a damn thing but make the skin between my eyes itch and my nostril hairs feel like tinsel. I wonder what my life would be like if my dad didnt make me start taking this stuff, if like, i dont know, maybe i figured out a way to concentrate without having to feel like a zombie sometimes. That shit, feeling like a zombie, i mean, that makes you feel kind of down, like you could use a pharmaceutical or two. That's why I'm asking really, cause, see, I'm kind of scared to start poppin the pills my mom has in her cabinet, i mean, like, i've seen what they can do, plus, like, i can't even pronounce whatever the hell it is they're called haha. but seriously, like, she was super sad and taking pills designed to make a sad person happy, but, i mean, all i can say is, no thanks. so, i'm asking, cause, i want to be happier than i have been lately and i'm thinking i should take it slow, like, work my way in to the heavier shit.
