Dear you,
You did nothing good for me. You were always putting me down, always telling me how I was wrong, always insulting me, always making me feel like I was nothing. I craved that attention, because it was the only attention I got, and I tried to be better for you. I was always so thankful that you stayed with me, even though I was obviously not good enough for you. You were my world. I didn't mind that you had me quit my job because one of my coworkers expressed concern about our relationship. I didn't mind that you made me choose between you and my friends. You were you, perfect and wonderful. Why would I say no to you?
It was so obvious what was happening. I was stuck in an abusive relationship but, like so many before me, I couldn't see that. I hated myself and so I stayed with you and you pushed my self esteem and self worth lower and lower until it was practically nonexistent.
I don't even feel guilty now for saying that I'm happy you died. I'm happy that you were driving drunk and ended up in a ditch. I'm happy that I got that clean, sharp break from you because those long hours spent remembering our "good times" made me finally realize how terrible you had been.
I'm in a new relationship now. It's my second after you died. The first one was a nice guy, but he wasn't prepared for my issues and I don't fault him for ending things with me. I went two years after that without a relationship, finding a good job, making great friends, keeping in touch with my family, buying a kitten, and enjoying life. I met him while I was out buying groceries and he asked me to dinner while I stood in line, putting aspirin and tampons on the conveyor. I agreed before I could talk myself out of it, and I'm so happy I did. We've been together for 5 months and the future is bright.
I hate you, you know. A better person than me would thank you for something stupid like making me stronger in the long run. But no. You almost ruined everything good about me, and I will never think of you without feeling furious that people like you exist. I just wanted to let you know. Burn in hell.
You did nothing good for me. You were always putting me down, always telling me how I was wrong, always insulting me, always making me feel like I was nothing. I craved that attention, because it was the only attention I got, and I tried to be better for you. I was always so thankful that you stayed with me, even though I was obviously not good enough for you. You were my world. I didn't mind that you had me quit my job because one of my coworkers expressed concern about our relationship. I didn't mind that you made me choose between you and my friends. You were you, perfect and wonderful. Why would I say no to you?
It was so obvious what was happening. I was stuck in an abusive relationship but, like so many before me, I couldn't see that. I hated myself and so I stayed with you and you pushed my self esteem and self worth lower and lower until it was practically nonexistent.
I don't even feel guilty now for saying that I'm happy you died. I'm happy that you were driving drunk and ended up in a ditch. I'm happy that I got that clean, sharp break from you because those long hours spent remembering our "good times" made me finally realize how terrible you had been.
I'm in a new relationship now. It's my second after you died. The first one was a nice guy, but he wasn't prepared for my issues and I don't fault him for ending things with me. I went two years after that without a relationship, finding a good job, making great friends, keeping in touch with my family, buying a kitten, and enjoying life. I met him while I was out buying groceries and he asked me to dinner while I stood in line, putting aspirin and tampons on the conveyor. I agreed before I could talk myself out of it, and I'm so happy I did. We've been together for 5 months and the future is bright.
I hate you, you know. A better person than me would thank you for something stupid like making me stronger in the long run. But no. You almost ruined everything good about me, and I will never think of you without feeling furious that people like you exist. I just wanted to let you know. Burn in hell.
