It's the silence that I crave. You would never understand how precious the silence is until you were here. Until you knew what it was like to sit here for eleven hours a day with the constant buzzing sound ringing in your ears, begging to be heard, to be understood. It's akin to the sound of mosquitos around your head on a warm summer night, warning you that they're about to bite, about to take something precious from you that you thought could only be yours. We all want the same thing here. We want you to agree to our offers, to our excuses, we want you not to ask questions but to stay on the line long enough to make us meet our goals, long enough to receive recognition for fitting into the standard but not short to the point where we miss the mark entirely. I feel as though we are vultures; lions. We are customer service, hear us roar. And if you listen, you will hear the same excuses, the same lines we feed to you to lure you in, to get you to agree with what we say. And you do. Because society tells you that we have the authority to tell you how things are. But some of you, you don't agree. You yell and fight and in the end, no matter how hard you try, you still lose. You still don't get what you want. We still win. And we don't feel any better for it.

I can't be the only one.. who hates this job. I feel like we all do but are too afraid to say it. To scream out into the room "I HATE THIS PLACE!" Small windows, too much noise, long days, the same script with every customer - over and over: minute after minute, hour after hour, day after day.

Even after you leave, you think about this place. There's no way to escape the echoes. There's no silence loud enough to erase the day from your mind. No way to get rid of the yellers, the arguers, the revolt. No way to escape the script. You bring the script home, practice it with your family, they buy it too. Your life becomes so ordinary, loses it's life, it's colour. You make your excuses politely and with finesse - just like with your customers. You finally become perfect at what you do and you practice it in all aspects of your life. It's satisfying. Until you realize that it's actually not a good thing - that it's hurting your relationships. You want to snap out of it, but when you're home, it's too hard to switch back - to be who you used to be before you learned to be this person that they've trained you to be. Who are you now? They don't ask you - they tell you. And you better be that person or they will let you know every day that you don't measure up - that you're not good enough. For this job? You didn't know you had to be good to succeed in a place like this. Thanks for the warning(sarcasm).

Maybe you'll be something real again some day. But how? You need to feed your family, you need to pay your bills. Too proud to ask for help. Must keep this job until something better comes along.