It smells stronger, but I can’t breathe.
It feels rougher, but I can’t touch it.
Something slides down my numb cheek. Through my cold nose ... And I thought I was sitting in my room
But I was gazing out the front window of my car going 95 mph. Everything seemed so slow but trees were disappearing from the wind of the speed. I was lucky the streets were empty and quiet. Lonely and quiet. And I didn’t know where I was going but it didn’t matter. I felt like the only person in the world. And it felt good for the first time in a very long time. I just didn’t care anymore, I couldn’t. I kept hearing the soft whispers of the vehement wind whispering in my ear a soothing encouragement,to keep going. Reminiscent images kept barging into my brain so I pushed the gas much further and further. And they would shatter away. I began to realize that everything you do in this world IS pointless. Solomon was right. I had read his writings and I could not get over him. The most intellectual man of his day, and to know that what we know now someone knew then. And the cycle continues. How long will it take a man to understand. But that was a pointless thought too. The streets began to get filled with honking cars. The ringing of the horns was a sweet chaotic mess to my ears. I rolled down the window and the fresh air rushed into my face battling with my hair. This never-ending feeling of euphoria captivated my heart, swirling down my spine intertwining to the pit of my stomach. I couldn’t help but smile a big smile from ear to ear. An uncontrollable laughter grew out of my lips. I hadn’t realized I was going down a steep hill. DEAD END. And my brakes were too late as I hit the curb. All the airbags slapped me around. And my head lashed against the wheel. I was certain to have a red smacking mark printed on my forehead but I didn’t bother to check. And yet no one was around still. I was sort of glad though, because I wasn’t about to explain and apologize and then get sent to the cuckoo house. I’d heard stories of that place…how inhumane how horrific. I got out of the car and checked the front bumper. It was completed dented but at least everything was intact no broken lights just dented scraped metal. I got back inside when to my luck someone walks out of their house. I guess the impact of the hit on my head was great because I couldn’t tell if it was a man or a woman. He was wearing an old faded black shirt with some striped pajama pants or something, barefoot. As the figure got closer I knew it was a young man. I was ready to hit reverse and jam but I didn’t. Don’t ask me why. Because I still don’t know why . I just sat there catatonic … again. I had to learn to snap out those phases. Lately I had been getting stuck on them. I felt like a helpless soul, like I was screaming and jumping in fury, anguish, fear… but I couldn’t move and no one could hear me or help me. So I just sat there tense. My windows were already down. . “Are you OK ?” He was soft-spoken. His eyes were gleaming and his eyelashes added to the sweet ridden eyes he wore. His lips were slightly curled. I realized I hadn’t answered and we were just staring intently into each other’s eyes. “Oh. Yeah I’m fine . I’m sorry…. I..” He cut me off. “Sorry? .. Are you sure you’re OK? You look hurt. ” He looked concerned. I had to compose myself. Here I was about to get infatuated with a total stranger. But I had never met anyone that could come off so sweet and not try. It was like his natural essence, his aura. He probably didn’t think the least of me of what I had been thinking of him. He was really concerned for just plainly myself being. “ Stay here. I’ll get you ice. You can’t drive just yet. ” I wanted to say no no and get on with my way. But I wanted to see him and hear him just once more. I couldn’t even believe my self. Was I going insane or something! I would never do this. He came back with ice in a napkin. And a glass of water. “Here drink some water and place this on your head.” Even when he didn’t smile he looked so serenely sweet. Very sincere. “Thank you. Look I’m sorry for all this trouble but I really must start heading back.” He open his mouth then closed it. He looked like he was about to say something but he stood quiet and just stared into my eyes. I couldn’t help but stare back. Yet I still didn’t move a finger. “ Honestly man, you don’t look like you’re ready to drive.. I would tell you to come in but my mother is over and I don’t want to wake her. We can stay out here in my front yard. ” Was I really looking in bad shape to drive? That concerned me now. And I began to get this familiar feeling , that feeling you get when you like someone and you begin to care what you like. Yeah that feeling. I stretched out and opened the mirror. Boy, was I right. I had the biggest whopping red fat mark layed across my forehead. How embrasssing. Like always I laughed. “Wow. Look at that baby. Don’t I look good tonight.” His lips grew into a soft smile. “So wont you come join me out my yard for a while?” “Just for a while.” And as I looked him he looked content and opened my door. And we walked and sat down on his yard. It was
It feels rougher, but I can’t touch it.
Something slides down my numb cheek. Through my cold nose ... And I thought I was sitting in my room
But I was gazing out the front window of my car going 95 mph. Everything seemed so slow but trees were disappearing from the wind of the speed. I was lucky the streets were empty and quiet. Lonely and quiet. And I didn’t know where I was going but it didn’t matter. I felt like the only person in the world. And it felt good for the first time in a very long time. I just didn’t care anymore, I couldn’t. I kept hearing the soft whispers of the vehement wind whispering in my ear a soothing encouragement,to keep going. Reminiscent images kept barging into my brain so I pushed the gas much further and further. And they would shatter away. I began to realize that everything you do in this world IS pointless. Solomon was right. I had read his writings and I could not get over him. The most intellectual man of his day, and to know that what we know now someone knew then. And the cycle continues. How long will it take a man to understand. But that was a pointless thought too. The streets began to get filled with honking cars. The ringing of the horns was a sweet chaotic mess to my ears. I rolled down the window and the fresh air rushed into my face battling with my hair. This never-ending feeling of euphoria captivated my heart, swirling down my spine intertwining to the pit of my stomach. I couldn’t help but smile a big smile from ear to ear. An uncontrollable laughter grew out of my lips. I hadn’t realized I was going down a steep hill. DEAD END. And my brakes were too late as I hit the curb. All the airbags slapped me around. And my head lashed against the wheel. I was certain to have a red smacking mark printed on my forehead but I didn’t bother to check. And yet no one was around still. I was sort of glad though, because I wasn’t about to explain and apologize and then get sent to the cuckoo house. I’d heard stories of that place…how inhumane how horrific. I got out of the car and checked the front bumper. It was completed dented but at least everything was intact no broken lights just dented scraped metal. I got back inside when to my luck someone walks out of their house. I guess the impact of the hit on my head was great because I couldn’t tell if it was a man or a woman. He was wearing an old faded black shirt with some striped pajama pants or something, barefoot. As the figure got closer I knew it was a young man. I was ready to hit reverse and jam but I didn’t. Don’t ask me why. Because I still don’t know why . I just sat there catatonic … again. I had to learn to snap out those phases. Lately I had been getting stuck on them. I felt like a helpless soul, like I was screaming and jumping in fury, anguish, fear… but I couldn’t move and no one could hear me or help me. So I just sat there tense. My windows were already down. . “Are you OK ?” He was soft-spoken. His eyes were gleaming and his eyelashes added to the sweet ridden eyes he wore. His lips were slightly curled. I realized I hadn’t answered and we were just staring intently into each other’s eyes. “Oh. Yeah I’m fine . I’m sorry…. I..” He cut me off. “Sorry? .. Are you sure you’re OK? You look hurt. ” He looked concerned. I had to compose myself. Here I was about to get infatuated with a total stranger. But I had never met anyone that could come off so sweet and not try. It was like his natural essence, his aura. He probably didn’t think the least of me of what I had been thinking of him. He was really concerned for just plainly myself being. “ Stay here. I’ll get you ice. You can’t drive just yet. ” I wanted to say no no and get on with my way. But I wanted to see him and hear him just once more. I couldn’t even believe my self. Was I going insane or something! I would never do this. He came back with ice in a napkin. And a glass of water. “Here drink some water and place this on your head.” Even when he didn’t smile he looked so serenely sweet. Very sincere. “Thank you. Look I’m sorry for all this trouble but I really must start heading back.” He open his mouth then closed it. He looked like he was about to say something but he stood quiet and just stared into my eyes. I couldn’t help but stare back. Yet I still didn’t move a finger. “ Honestly man, you don’t look like you’re ready to drive.. I would tell you to come in but my mother is over and I don’t want to wake her. We can stay out here in my front yard. ” Was I really looking in bad shape to drive? That concerned me now. And I began to get this familiar feeling , that feeling you get when you like someone and you begin to care what you like. Yeah that feeling. I stretched out and opened the mirror. Boy, was I right. I had the biggest whopping red fat mark layed across my forehead. How embrasssing. Like always I laughed. “Wow. Look at that baby. Don’t I look good tonight.” His lips grew into a soft smile. “So wont you come join me out my yard for a while?” “Just for a while.” And as I looked him he looked content and opened my door. And we walked and sat down on his yard. It was
