Judging by my six classmates in hebrew school, my invitations to my coming of manhood, my bar-mitzvah, the first time an older woman would make lewd comments my way, would be accepted with pity and a kind of regret that children are not alone in feeling when they feel socially trapped. So each of my classmates came, as did most of my family. but when you look at the kids' table, there were no friends of mine from school, and nobody else young came. So it looked like I got my school mates to come to pretend I had a gathering. They pretty well ignored me and got to doing their own kid thing. Which I was pretty proud of, you know, that way they wouldn't harass me about where my dad was and why some guy named Kim seemed to be the master of ceremonies. The bathroom was very nice, men on the left, please. I felt unworthy of unzipping in there, but once I had done it no joy was greater. see, the city club of greater greensboro is on the 19th floor of the Jeffereson Pilot insurance building, and even if the food is renowned, the view is unsurpassed for thirty miles. Less vertigo from heights and more wondering how to get a dance out of Anne Lazovik. Did it happen? Probably briefly, much to her surprise. There was a baby photo of me on display propped up on an easel for guests to sign. It's pretty creepy now to look at it. Except grandpa and Tony signed it. And so I love it. Scotch and soda from Kim made me feel light-headed and I acted the ass for the clown whose job it was to embarass me. Full circle there; entertaining kids' parties was a gig I took on two summers ago in order to pay for the money I wasn't making tutoring. Captain hook, spiderman, a ghost. all of them juggled. this guy was a tool from way back, and so he probably never agreed to do a bar-mitzvah ever again.